Over 60 inspiration – Harmony Designed

Updated November, 2019

As I was reviewing past blog posts, I came across this one that touched a nerve for me. So, I thought I would re-post it in hopes that it might do the same for some of you, too.

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First posted April 11, 2017

Last night I was watching an episode of Grace & Frankie (the Netflix series starring Jane Fonda, Lily Tomlin, Martin Sheen and Sam Waterston). If you haven’t seen it yet, it’s about four older people in relationship to each other in different ways (too long to explain here, but worth checking out).

The two women share a home and are starting a business together. In the episode I was watching last night, they both hurt their backs and were unable to accomplish the simplest of tasks.

At one point, Jane Fonda says to Lily Tomlin “It seems like every day our bodies try to tell us we can’t. But in my mind, I think I can do anything because I’m still a little girl climbing trees.” To which Lily Tomlin replies and reassures her “That little girl is still there. She’s still in you.”

I loved that. It made me sit up and take note . . . literally.

I don’t know about you, but some days my body feels every day of my age. Most days, not even close. And always in my mind I’m still that young girl with dreams and ambitions. Maybe not the one climbing trees (was never much of a tree climber to begin with, give me the monkey bars any day), but definitely the girl climbing her way to new adventures.

The reality is that our physicality changes as we age, and not always in a good way. It takes a bit more effort to keep things in check, and a lot more effort to improve our fitness. So we do what we can and carry on.

For example, I didn’t sleep well last night. Woke up around 2:30 and couldn’t go back to sleep. Today, I’m dragging a bit. When I was younger, this wouldn’t have fazed me. In fact, I could get little sleep for 2 or 3 nights in a row and be fine, then catch up on the weekend. Not now. This is when I feel my years.

With all that said though, our physical self is not who we are. It may have changed in ways we’re not thrilled with, but we should certainly not be defined by the changes.

We are a reflectionof many things, including our mental and emotional states, our values and belief system, our life experience, and our own definition of who and what we are, but not our health status.

Coming from the Boomer Generation, the generation of eternal youth (or so we like to think), aging can be a harsh reality. Never wanting to give up that banner of youthful & hip, we are also the generation, I’m hopeful, that will change the face and expectations of aging.

I know I’m not alone in choosing to be defined by how I live my life, by who and what I love. And by what I give. Not by aches and pains.

I think it is vitally important to keep in mind that as we experience some physical changes that feel like a loss in our bodies, we can supplant them with mental and emotional vigor to invest in new interests, intelligence, experience and savvy to take on life’s challenges and chances, and a loving heart to offer hope and strength to the generations behind us.

“I love living. I love that I’m alive to love my age.” Maya Angelou wrote that. Don’t you love it. She went on to say “There are many people who went to bed just as I did yesterday evening and didn’t wake this morning. I love and feel very blessed that I did. I love, too, that I know a little more today than I did yesterday, or I simply know it more profoundly.”

Sigh. So beautifully stated.

So while we may not be the little girl or boy who climbs trees anymore, aren’t we now so much more?

Till next time,

Judy

My sister wrote those words to me in a text recently. Her husband was not feeling well and we were considering canceling our sisters’ getaway. At any time in life, unforeseen circumstances can alter your world on a dime. As we get older, these surprises become more common or even expected.

Such is life.

There is a gentle and beautiful acceptance within those words – at least to my way of thinking. Not resignation, just a knowing and accepting that life is full of change. Some good, some not so good. Fighting it and bemoaning the changes won’t alter a thing, but will certainly bring you down, wasting precious time. I think age tends to mellow that old fight, or at least I hope it does.

Speaking of surprises, a few weeks ago nearly to the end of our home updating projects, I had to have an emergency appendectomy. Ouch! And, great timing. I’ll admit, I wasn’t as grace-filled as my sister when we had to alter our plans and delay the last of the house projects for a few more days, and put off a getaway that Michael and I were so looking forward to. But with enough time, I gave in and just focused on healing. Things don’t always go according to plan.

Such is life.

With all the house projects we took on this Summer now completed (thank goodness) and my healing on track, I have found myself felling a bit “stalled.” Not sensing a clear direction – with my blog or anything else. Since we essentially put real life on hold while invaders came into our house to paint and do floors and cabinets and clean, then add to that my little surgical “adventure,” I find myself spinning a bit, trying to get a foothold again.

Such is life.

Sometimes you’re on it, knowing where each foot will land, what each day brings, what next step to take. Other times, you have to float for a while and trust that you’ll find your way back.

Even though it’s a little uncomfortable, I’ve come to see these episodes in my life as a good omen. I believe it’s my subconscious giving me a kick in the fanny to do something – get creative – be more active – meditate – spend time in nature — just do somethingto facilitate a breakthrough. It’s easy to be lulled into complacency when things are going well. But complacency is not a good thing. It allows us to pass our days without really experiencing them. Even if the experience is not what you want, it is still a part of your life and can be embraced without becoming the worst of it.

Such is life.

So even though one sister was not able to physically join the other two in our annual sisters’ night because of real life challenges, we improvised with a video chat to make sure that our much-loved tradition is not lost. The three of us were still together, we still had time to talk and laugh and enjoy that sister connection that is an important part of each of us.

This is the part of being this age that I LOVE. You know what’s most important in your life, your focus is clearer, there’s more time to truly indulge in what matters, and going with the flow comes easier. Because you know . . .

. . . such is life.

Till next time,Judy