Have you ever had one (or many) of those times when you stress out over some interaction View Post
Have you ever had one (or many) of those times when you stress out over some interaction View Post
Here I am again, sitting in a bookstore. As I glance over at a shelf of books, one title jumps out at me and lingers in my mind. “Start Where You Are.” It’s something about starting a journal. But where it hit me was in my current state of indecisiveness. You see, having been “off career,” unemployed, no longer working, or just plain retired for over a year now, I can say that sometimes having too many options, too many opportunities can result in total indecisiveness and paralysis. Let me clarify.
While I love the slower pace and getting to choose how I spend every day without competing obligations, I would also like to find my next “thing.” For example, should I commit to a volunteer position, but then that begs the question “to what do I volunteer my time.” Or should I change my fitness routine substantially in order to amp up my energy and strength to new levels, or dedicate myself to a new creative pursuit – say oil painting, or should I register for classes at a local college, or . . . ?
See what I mean? So many options. So few decisions.
Which one do I do? Where do I start?
In all honesty, while I definitely want to do everything, I also don’t want to give up my freedom. I still bristle at the idea of being or feeling mandated to a particular schedule.
I wonder if my resistance is just part of the “still early days” of not working, or am I slipping into a persistent mode of “this girl just wants to have fun.” And if I am, is there anything really wrong with that?
I recently read an article from a friend that basically ripped my generation of Boomers apart for being self-centered, narcissistic, society-and-earth-destroying creatures from another planet. And as much as I don’t want to admit it, I did find some truth in it, and in that truth, guilt.
So even though I am relishing the freedom and play nowadays, I yearn to be of value, to be of service. And not only to assuage the guilt of my generation’s missteps, but because I know I have a lot to give. A lot to share.
This issue came up among friends over the weekend, and one friend said, “yeah, it’s hard to know what to do next, and the time we have is shorter at this age, so it’s imperative that we make a decision and do something!”
So true. But still hard to know where to start.
Hence the book title that got to me: Start Where You Are.
Giving the book a little credit for getting me started, I’ve decided to take another look
at journaling. Why not? I’m ready for any tool to help me out of this monkey-mind-chattering of what to do/what not to do.
I used to be a dedicated journaler . . . for years I recorded my thoughts, activities, feelings, yearnings, and goals in a daily journal. Over time, I became less and less committed until the entire effort fell by the wayside. Maybe now’s the time to reconsider.
I did a little research about the benefits of journaling and found an article in Psychology Today that spoke to when it’s most useful and beneficial to journal. Here’s a snapshot.
Journaling can have a positive effect on your behavior and well-being if it:
Now we’re talking.
I also read about keeping a journal of “Happy Moments” in which you write just before bed each night about your happiest moment from that day. I love that idea, too, and think it could shed some light on those simple things that bring you joy and might get overlooked in the busy-ness of life.
Start Where You Are. I get it. I’m thinking this journaling thing is the right next step for me. Maybe the writing, doodling, and collaging of my feeling/thoughts/confusion in one place will help clarify a few things for me.
It’s worth a try.
So there you go. Start where you are.
One last thing, just so you know I’m not one of those completely self-absorbed humans, I never, ever forget that having “too many options and too many opportunities” is something to be grateful for and humbled by.
Are you waiting to Start Where You Are?
Till next time,
Judy
Two days ago, I celebrated my blog’s one-year birthday. How about that? It caught me by surprise when I looked at the date on the calendar and realized how quickly that had come around. Kinda scary.
A whole year. 75 posts. Untold support and encouragement from so many people. And lots of learning on my part (with much more to go, of course).
So, onward.
Since my post last week when I spoke to feeling a lack of inspiration lately, I have received all kinds of support. Some came in the form of comments or emails or calls from friends (all very much appreciated). Others came by way of example.
Case in point. #timesup #oprahOMG #metoo
At the Golden Globes Sunday night, Oprah gave one of the most electrifying and inspiring speeches I’ve heard in a long time (in my opinion, anyway).
Even though she was addressing the gender inequality in Hollywood, and basically all industries, the essence of her speech, and of the TimesUp and MeToo movements, is all about finding our own voice. Speaking up. Leaning in. Getting on with it.
In the crazy clatter of these complicated times, and with the fears and insecurities that hold us all back in different ways, each of us – women and men – must find and express ourselves in the authentic, true-to-oneself way that only we can do. Especially as we get older when we have so much to share. I believe it is our imperative, our obligation, to step up, find our way, and show ourselves and others a better way.
All of that got me thinking. Maybe this case of low-inspiration that I’m experiencing is merely a cover for not feeling or following my own voice. Perhaps that’s the path to finding the inspiration that will guide me.
“If you can see your path laid out in front of you step by step, you know it’s not your path. Your own path is the one you make with every step you take. That’s why it’s your path.” Joseph Campbell
OK, there’s a little tingle. I’m feeling something. Times up!
Take a step . . . just take a step, and then another, and another . . . and . . . you get the point. I don’t have to figure it all out now, I don’t have to know what the path is exactly, I just have to start.
I can do that.
Speaking of getting started, one of the emails of support that I received last week was from a dear friend (thank you, Peter) who offered a great suggestion to help me get unstuck.
It seems my friend had another friend who had “stepped off “ her career years ago, and with all the sudden free time she then had, she decided to tackle it head on. She and a buddy decided to do something new, something they’d never done before, every single week for a year. A year! 52 things!
OK, I’ll admit I’m not ready to take on the weekly game, but once a month sounds doable – and fun – to me. If I can manage more than that, I will.
By the way, I’m open to ideas on what some of these things could be, so if you have any, send them my way, please. Nothing crazy now – I’m not jumping out of an airplane or off a mountaintop, just so you know.
I’ve come up with a few simple ideas – one of which is “throwing clay.” My husband has resumed his interest in pottery/ceramics and goes to a studio to throw said clay every week. He said I could come with him one day and he’d show me how to do it. Sounds like fun. So, I’m in.
The other thought was that I could take a cake-decorating class. Now, I have absolutely no interest in decorating cakes (eating them, yes, decorating – not so much), but maybe that’s the point. Trying something new, something different than I would typically gravitate to might stimulate the inspiration pot that I’m trying to smoke . . . er . . . stir (just a joke given California’s new legalized status).
Other things might be:
So now I have some things in mind to get me started, and I’m reading a lot of inspiring material, talking to inspiring people and generally feeling a whole lot better. And I can see things (inspiration) beginning to take shape already.
Wish me luck. Better yet – join me in the “something new every month” adventure. There’s nothing to lose, and lots of inspiration to be gained.
Because . . . Times up!
Till next time,
Judy
If you’re like me, the phrase “those are the rules” starts me running in the opposite direction. I immediately look for a way to push back, rebel, or find another way, just to prove the “enforcer” wrong.
I know – not the most mature reaction. View Post