And so it is.

A couple of very dear friends of mine are struggling a little bit currently, for different reasons, and as I was sitting in traffic this week, I was thinking of them. I looked up and saw a bumper sticker on the car in front of me that said “And so it is.” That’s it. That’s all it said, but as soon as I read it, I felt a bit of calm come over me.

The feeling surprised me, and started me thinking about what the phrase was really saying.

And so it is. It might have origins in religion or other spiritual practice. I’m not sure. But, to me, it was a reminder that when trying times happen, the best thing to do is to breathe, find some calm, accept the reality of the situation, and release the emotional mind games that make your head spin. Oh, and remember that you can’t control every situation. You can only deal with it as it occurs. (Apparently those four little words really packed a punch with me.)

When I was in my 20’s, 30’s and even into my 40’s, I exhausted myself physically and emotionally so many times trying to make things “right.” If I could just work a little harder, then the job would get easier or I’d get the promotion. Or if I changed my expectations, maybe this guy would be the one.

I wanted so much to take control and make things happen that when they didn’t work the way I thought they should have, I was wracked with frustration, guilt, disappointment. You name it.

And a lot of time was spent in a fruitless pursuit of reality avoidance.

Those experiences, all that angst, were great lessons for life though. I know they gave me greater empathy for others who are now caught up in some trying situations. And they taught me the invaluable lesson of knowing that you can’t control everything, but you can calm down, accept the situation without emotion, and then decide on the next step.

And so it is.

Maybe the ability to accept reality and reframe an issue in order to deal with it constructively and with less emotion is another one of those “gifts of age.”

I hope so because my guess is that there will be more of those real-life struggles as time marches on. So it’s best to be practiced in the art of acceptance, recalibration . . . and thoughtful, measured action.

Anyway, in our crazy, busy, sometimes mixed-up and scary world, having a “stop and start over” mantra of sorts might help reframe and refocus our efforts. Certainly worth a try.

It’s amazing what words of wisdom are written on bumper stickers and in Hallmark cards these days. Ah, modern society.

And so it is.

Till next time,




  1. Julie Loats
    September 1, 2017 / 8:30 am

    Well said Judy. I agree completely. It’s not as complicated as we try to make it…It just is.

  2. dona
    September 1, 2017 / 8:40 am

    So Great Judy! Its when we go through “LIFE” and hit our high mountains and low valleys, is where wisdom is born. I have also learned through the years to respond, don’t react. Yes, all this gray hair whether it be visible or covered with hair dye, it’s a sign of wisdom, and its our CROWN OF GLORY!

  3. Candy
    September 2, 2017 / 7:31 am

    This is excellent. I read this a couple of times to let it all sink in. It definitely resonates with me. Thank you.

  4. Cyndie
    September 2, 2017 / 4:38 pm

    Thank you Judy. This resonated with me today- all the second guessing I’ve been doing with my recent move and new job.

  5. Colleen Lehman
    September 3, 2017 / 9:33 am

    Love your words, my friend. Especially ring true for me. ❤️❤️

  6. Debby
    September 6, 2017 / 7:53 am

    You are right on!

  7. Tammy Schumacher
    October 18, 2017 / 1:18 pm

    I love this; really makes you think! I find your writing so inspiring. I am sitting at the airport reading all th wines I have missed, and it is a gift?

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *