Just a little romance

Happy Valentine’s Day!  Today, we celebrate love in all its forms. Romantic, parental, friend-to-friend, pet-love and more.

I like Valentine’s Day.  It’s a nice reminder to give a little extra time and attention to our beloveds. My husband and I have a sweet tradition.

We keep it pretty simple, usually stay home and cuddle up, have a special meal and then exchange 4 or 5 cards ranging in message from funny to sweet to over-the-top romantic. We look forward to opening each card, taking turns, one at a time. It’s a quiet moment we take to express the love we share.

A few weeks ago, a dear friend of mine and I were having a nice long chat over a lovely glass of wine, and we landed on the topic of romance “at our age.” We’ve both been happily married a long time, and know that we’re lucky to have such great guys. They’re our partners, best friends, favorite playmates, and the loves of our lives. We did comment, though, that some of those over-the-top grand gestures of undying passion from the early days of courtship and marriage seem to be truly something of the past. We were not complaining, just noticing it as one of those things that change over time . . . with age.

The conversation then went to whether we really wanted those grand gestures again, and surprisingly, the answer was “not really.” Life and love are so much richer now. There are so many things that remind us of that if we’re mindful. Like waking at 2 a.m. and feeling him lying next to you, and in that half-asleep moment smiling for the simple joy and peace of it . . .  or not eating the last cookie because you know how much he or she will enjoy it . . . sharing the bigger, sometimes difficult, life events knowing without a doubt that you’ll be the shelter in the storm for each other.

Sweet moments that flit by, but taken together create a beautiful life.

As we continued our discussion, it became clear that it was time for a few romantic gestures of our own – hopefully sparking a similar response from those two great guys. After all, shouldn’t expressions of our love be something we routinely make an effort to do?  This is another one of those “if not now, when” things.

While we’re on the subject of love, how about a little self-love? It might sound selfish, but really, nothing could be further from the truth. The happier and more loving you are with yourself, the more love you have to give. So at least for today, but hopefully every day, I’m going to practice a little less self-criticism and a little more self-appreciation.

We all deserve a little more romance in our lives.

How about you? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

Till next time,

Judy

4 Comments

  1. dona
    February 14, 2017 / 7:29 am

    Love this, Judy! I’ve been married 30 years and we were just talking last night about all the romantic, (and unmentionable) fun times and silly things we did in the younger years of our marriage. I reminded my husband of all that I did for him(most of the time forcing myself to do it, just for him) and he mentioned how much he enjoyed it and he said how its not too late and hopefully those days aren’t over. So I thought, you know, I”m not 80 years old (not to say that romance ends at 80) but I should still take that extra effort to be able to fulfill his so called “fantasies” and “desires”. As we all know it takes lots of effort and self denial in a marriage. It’s so easy to take a back seat and play Ms. Independent and do as I please not taking into consideration what he still desires. So with that, I will try to be creative and do something extra special today to show the love I still have for my husband. Maybe a special dinner, a romantic slow dance by candlelight, a massage, or even a foot rub, or a stroll on the beach. I encourage the women reading this to do something extra special for your mate. As Judy said, waking up in the middle of the night and see him lying next to you and smile. He’s not always going to be there. I don’t ever want to take advantage of his presence. Have a LOVEly day!

    • Judy McLane
      February 14, 2017 / 7:51 am

      Thanks so much, Dona. You’re so right – we don’t ever want to take our love for granted. And I love some of your suggestions for the extra special things we could do for our sweeties today. Hope your day (and night) is wonderful.

  2. Candy
    February 15, 2017 / 3:59 pm

    Great post. Interesting topic. I love the sweet tradition of sharing several Valentine’s cards and the fun of opening them. Also, the idea behind it of taking the time to express your shared love. The traditional Valentine’s candy and flowers are romantic expressions but taking a quiet moment to share feelings seems richer and more fulfilling. There’s no doubt that the notion of a little romance is something that changes with age and a long term relationship. I read somewhere that no woman is ever older that eighteen in her heart. I think there is truth to that and that little part of me still wants a little romance every now and then. At the same time I agree that love is richer with age. I love your point that if we are mindful, there are so many things that remind us of that. Perhaps there are many incidents of “a little romance” in my relationship and I simply have to open my eyes to see them. I will ponder that.

  3. Beverly Paige
    February 18, 2017 / 8:28 am

    This post put a smile on heart!

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